Hi my lovelies! Okay… I owe y’all a little apology for disappearing for a hot minute. I recently started a new job, and lemme tell y’all.. The adjustment has been real. After working high-paced jobs with wild schedules-12 hour shifts, overnights, all the chaos-I really didn’t think that switching to a “normal” Monday through Friday, “9-5” would be this hard.

But apparently… it is 😅

Like… why am I this tired at 7pm?? Who approved this?!

I did have a season in between where I slowed down a bit-working part-time, focusing on my family and school, being more present at home- and I think I got a little too comfortable in that rhythm. So jumping back into a full-time schedule has definitely been an adjustment for ya girl.

But I’m starting to find my groove again, figuring out a new routine, and most importantly, I’m back! 💚


Now… let’s talk about something we’ve ALL experienced at one point or another.


If you’ve ever been standing in your yard, holding a watering can, scratching your head, staring at a plant you swore you were taking care of, wondering why it’s suddenly on its last leg…

hi, welcome.

You’re in the right place 🤪

When I first started gardening, I thought it was gonna be all sunshine, thriving plants, and cute little, colorful harvest baskets like you see on social media. What I didn’t expect was the confusion, trial and error, and the very humbling realization that plants do not, in fact, care about your feelings.

Some of my plants thrived… most of them? Let’s just say they taught me some very important lessons. Loudly. Repeatedly. And sometimes with a touch of dramatic flair. Especially those first strawberries I tried growing… (Guess who learned the hard way that you’re not supposed to bury their crown?! I didn’t even know they had a crown!)

SO if you’re new to gardening, or even if you’ve been at it for a while and still feel like you’re winging it half the time, this post is for you! These are a few of the things that I wish I knew before I ever transplanted my first seedling.

First. Just a little reminder, if your plants are surviving out of spite… you’re still doing much better than you think 💚

LESSON #1: It’s Not You… It’s Your Soil.
Okay, maybe it’s you a little

You can do everything “right”-water your plants, give them sunlight, talk to them like they’re your emotional support system-and they’ll still struggle if your soil isn’t doing its job.

Ask me how I know 😅 I was out there blaming myself and my plants were like “ma’am. it’s the soil.” But let’s be for real, that was on me a bit, too.

When I first started gardening, I thought soil was just… dirt. Like, you plop a plant in it and go about your business. But healthy soil? It’s alive. It’s full of microorganisms, organic matter, and all the good stuff your plants actually need to thrive. Once I started focusing on my soil, adding compost, improving drainage, feeding the soil instead of just the plants, everything changed. My plants grew stronger, produced more, looked healthy, and stopped acting like they were personally offended by my care.

Poor soil can lead to stunted growth and yellowing, sad plants. Feed the soil, not just the plant.

If you want to go deeper into soil health, and learn why it’s the foundation for a healthy garden, I break it all down in this post 👉 Good Dirt Matters

LESSON #2: Watering Wrong Will Humble You Real Quick

Watering seems like it should be the easiest part of gardening… right? RIGHT?! You give your plants water… they grow… everybody’s happy.

Yeah.. no.

This is one of the fastest ways to humble yourself in the garden. I used to think I was being a good plant parent by watering all the time. Like “look at me, being consistent and staying on top of it.” I thought I was helping. I was, in fact, the problem. My poor plants were drowning and silently judging me. They were like “please lady… just let us breathe!”

Turns out, there’s a big difference between watering often and watering correctly. Overwatering your plants can lead to root rot, droopy plants, and yellowing leaves. Underwatering can lead to dry, crispy, sad plants. But also yellowing, droopy leaves.

That’s right! Both can look similar. I’m not even kidding. This was one thing that confused me so much in the beginning. You’ll see droopy leaves, sad plants, yellowing… and your first instinct is “Oh no! It needs water!” So you water it. And then it gets worse. Because sometimes, it didn’t need more water… It needed less.

How do you know if your plant needs more water, or less? Check the soil first! (Everything comes back to the soil) I push my finger down into the dirt, roughly two inches. If it’s still moist, STEP AWAY FROM THE WATER HOSE. If it’s dry, give it a good, deep drink. Deep watering is not only beneficial for your plants, but it is so much more time-efficient for you. I mean, we are BUSY. Ain’t nobody got time for watering every. single. day.

Don’t fret lovelies, I will be doing a more in depth post on watering here in the near future.

LESSON #3: Stop Guessing Your Sunlight

Your plants are picky about sunlight. And honestly, same. I’m a ginger.

Understanding sunlight sounds simple, but it’s one of those things that will quietly sabotage all your hard work if you’re just guessing. Some plants need 6-8+ hours of direct sun, while others will absolutely struggle if they get too much. And here’s the tricky part-sunlight in your yard isn’t the same everywhere. It changes throughout the day, hits different angles, and what feels sunny to you might actually be “partial sun” at best.

☀️Full Sun: 6-8+ hours
🌤️Partial Sun/Shade: 3-6 hours
🌥️Shade: Even less

Observe your space throughout the day. Make note of how much sun each area gets at different times of the day. Plan around the amount of sun your space gets. Also, some plants like morning and early afternoon sun, but prefer some shade during the hotter temps. So take that into consideration, as well.

LESSON #4: Spring? That’s cute.
Be Mindful of Your Frost Dates

If you live in Middle Tennessee, you KNOW the mind games Mother Nature plays this time of year. Tell me why it’ll feel like Spring for a few days… sunny, warm, got you outside feeling productive, making plans, maybe even side-eyeing your seed packets singing Mariah Carey “IT’S TIIIIIIMMMMMEEEEE”. And then the weather just… changes. Three times in one week.

Seriously. Last week it felt like spring. We had the A/C back on, it was warm and sunny outside. Then, over the weekend we got hit with some nasty storms. We even had a tornado on Sunday! 🌪️🙃 (Who doesn’t enjoy hunkering down five people in a tiny half bathroom at 10:30 on a school night?!) Monday? Snow. I wish I was joking. Thankfully, it didn’t stick. By Thursday, we were back up into the 70s like nothing ever happened. My poor plants don’t know what’s going on, and honestly, neither do I.

That’s why knowing your frost dates matters. Frost doesn’t care how nice it was yesterday. It’ll show up uninvited and take out your plants overnight if you plant too early. Knowing my average last frost date in the spring, and my average first frost date in the fall has helped me plan what plants to grow and when. Some plants prefer cooler temperatures, while some plants ain’t having any of that.

Learning to be patient (still working on that, myself) and waiting until you’re safely past your last frost date will save you a lot of frustration, time, money, and heartbreak. Because around here? The weather will absolutely test you. And create trust issues.

LESSON #5: Some Plants Are Besties… Some Are Not…

Not all plants plants play well together in the sandbox. errr… raised bed? I wish I had known that before I started planting things wherever all willy nilly. Some plants actually help each other grow, repel pests, and improve flavor. Others? They compete, attract the same pests or diseases, or just really don’t vibe well together. Some plants thrive together, while others act like they’ve got beef for no reason. So basically, your garden has friendships and a little bit of drama.

Companion planting is just being intentional about what plants you plant together, and which ones you keep away from each other. Once you understand it, it makes gardening a whole lot easier. You’ll see such a difference in your plants. I will also be doing a more in depth post on companion planting in the near future! This was one of my favorite things to learn about when it comes to gardening, and I can ramble all day about it.

Now. Does this mean if you plant something “wrong” everything will immediately fail? No. But it can make things harder than they need to be. And listen. We’re all about working smarter, not harder over here. Like the other lessons, keep an eye out for a future post on companion planting! I’ll also touch on it in each of my plant of the week spotlights, telling y’all what works well with the plant in the spotlight, and what you should keep away!

Once I started being a little more intentional about who I planted together, things got a lot smoother… But then I ran into a whole nother issue-some plants don’t just grow, they take over! 👀

LESSON #6: Some Plants Will Take Over Your Life
Looking at you, Mint 👀👀

Listen. I need to have a word with whoever first introduced mint as a “cute little herb.” Because nobody warned me. Or maybe they did, and I thought, It’ll be fine. Spoiler alert. It was NOT fine.

Some plants are spreaders… AGGRESSIVE spreaders. And if you don’t plant them in a container, they will take over. They send out underground runners and will pop up everywhere if you let them. And once they are established? Good luck keeping them under control. Mint is the main offender, but it’s not the only one. Oregano, Lemon Balm, other ground covers. They’re cute, but they can’t be trusted.

The easiest way to keep your sanity? Plant them in containers. That way you can still enjoy them without being held hostage by them.

Now don’t get me wrong, these plants are great. They’re hardy, easy to grow, and they’re super useful. You just have to give them boundaries. And if there’s one thing gardening will teach you, boundaries are important.

Once I figured out how to contain the chaos, things got a little more manageable. But then I realized something else-some plants don’t spread out… they fall over.

Lesson #7: Some Plants Need Support
(And Not Just Emotional Support)

I fully believed my plants would just grow. You know. Upwards. On their own. Like strong, independent plants. And while some plants are independent, some are… absolutely not.

Some need support. And I ain’t just talking about emotional support here. Although, trust me. I’ve stood in the garden before telling my plants, “You’re doing amazing sweetie. Please don’t die on me.” But unfortunately, that’s not enough.

Some plants physically can’t support themselves once they start growing and producing. They start off strong, and then suddenly… can’t hold themselves together. They get taller, heavier, and then one day you walk outside and they’re just leaning. Or flopped over. Or fully laid out like they’ve given up on life.

A few common ones:
➡️ Tomatoes need cages, stakes, trellis, etc. They get heavy FAST
➡️ Peppers can benefit from support once they start producing, I usually use a stake of some sort
➡️ Beans/Peas need something to climb. And they climb QUICKLY
➡️ Cucumbers do amazing when growing vertically.

Giving your plants support keeps them off the ground. This can help prevent rot and disease by improving airflow. It also helps plants grow stronger and healthier. Harvesting becomes easier, too, especially on your back!

Keep in mind your weather, as well. You want to make sure your support is sturdy and can hold the weight of your plants. This past week has shown us how crazy it can get in Middle Tennessee. Those straight line winds are no joke! One good storm, and suddenly your plant is face down in the dirt lookin real dramatic for no reason.
Supported plants = thriving plants. (Kinda like humans, amiright?)
Unsupported plants = chaos. Aaaannnd not the cute kind, either.

You can support your plants in several different ways. Cages, trellises, arches or arbors, obelisks, stakes, fencing. All perfectly acceptable ways to support your plants. Hell, you can even use twine, like with the Florida Weave. Whatever your plant needs, and whatever you prefer. I use a mix of these, it just depends on the plant, for me. My favorite by far is the arch trellis. I love the tunnel of green it creates, it’s just so magical! If you’d like a future post about the different types of support, lemme know!


If there’s one thing gardening will teach you, it’s humility. One minute you’re feeling real confident, the next? A storm rolls through, your plants are sideways, and you’re out there in your pajamas, looking around, questioning your life choices. But here’s the thing-you’re still learning! Every mistake, every wonky plant, every “well that didn’t work” moment? That’s how you grow.

So don’t stress about getting it perfect. Just keep showing up, keep planting, and keep trying.

If your plants have ever humbled you (no judgment here), you’re in good company. Come sit on the porch with me–we’ll swap stories, share tips, and pretend we totally meant to do that 😉

Leave a comment below sharing what you wish you had known before you started gardening! And don’t forget to subscribe!